Sunday, March 15, 2015

The 40-Year-Old Virgin

As a member of the LDS church, I made a covenant that I would not have sex with anyone other than my husband. Since I haven’t yet had the opportunity for marriage, this means that I am still a virgin. That’s right—I’ve never had sex—and yet …. I am still happy! Although I have no doubt that sex with a loving spouse is a great contributor to happiness, not having that does not automatically mean I have become a bitter, sexless old maid. In considering how to approach this topic, I’ve thought of some questions that might be posed to me, if someone actually wanted to ask about my sex (or really, non-sex) life.

1. Is your sex drive lower than normal?
Absolutely not. I find men very (sometimes very extremely!) attractive and feel the same urges as any healthy adult woman. However, because I made a commitment years ago that I wouldn’t give into temptation, I know that sex is off the table and not even an option in my dating life.

2. Have you ever had the opportunity to have sex?
Yes. Several times, actually. I’d rather not go into details about it, but obviously I didn’t do it—and sometimes it wasn’t as easy to say no as I would have liked.

3. How do you resist temptation?
One thing that is helpful for me is to only date LDS men. Most of them have made the same commitment as I have to abstinence before marriage and have other similar values to mine. For people who are not LDS, I think it is still helpful to date people with similar beliefs and goals to their own. Sometimes thoughts pop into my head without any apparent provocation (Why, hello, Captain Hook from Once Upon a Time. You are looking soooo hot today!), so distractions are also a good thing. Doing something I love is usually adequate to divert my attention and keep my mind from dwelling on sex. People talk about how guys are obsessed with sex, but girls think about it a lot too. Thinking about it and acting on those thoughts are not the same thing, though. In a society that encourages people to do whatever they feel, it is important to remember that it is not impossible to maintain self-control and decency while enjoying life.

4. Are you a prude and just don’t know much about sex?
I have to say, I think I actually know more about sex than I need to—from health class, friends, family members, television, movies, etc., etc. As for being a prude, my friends would probably laugh at that. I confess I often tend towards awkward, inappropriate humor and should probably tone it down sometimes—but it’s so dang funny! I enjoy a good “that’s what she said” joke as much as anyone. I have been trying to do better lately, though, about staying away from trashy movies and TV shows.

5. Do you ever feel frustrated or resentful that you don’t get to have sex?
Um….yes. Of course! Remaining a virgin doesn’t mean I don’t ever want to have sex or wish that I could. Luckily, I don’t feel that way all the time. Focusing on the myriad of other awesome things in my life is really the best way I’ve found to thwart feelings of bitterness.

Sex is only one aspect of life and a lack of it doesn’t have to hinder the joy I find in everything else. I have so many things to be grateful for and plenty of other exciting things to do!

Saturday, February 21, 2015

Let Your Light Shine

The best way I've found to live a happy life is to actually do things that make me happy. Seems simple, right? Sometimes it can take awhile, though, to figure out what makes you feel true joy. Luckily for me, one of the things that makes me feel the most joy has been part of my life for as long as I can remember.

A considerable part of my own happiness comes from cultivating and sharing my talents. I started playing the piano when I was very young and have always loved to perform. My main focus is accompanying for choirs. I love the feeling of contributing an important aspect to a performance while also being part of a group dynamic. It makes me feel unified with the choir members and the director, grateful for the audience's appreciation of our music, and good about myself.

Everyone has a special talent to develop and I feel that it's important to find your own little niche in the world. It's so great to have something that you know you're good at which can serve as a go-to happy place. Just get out there and do your own happy dance...or song...or sport...or cooking...or writing.....or whatever it may be. Just be undeniably you!

Saturday, February 14, 2015

Singles' Awareness Day

I'm a forty-year-old woman who has never been married. I'm also a Mormon, and in a culture very focused on marriage and children, I've seen too many single women become bitter, jaded, or just generally unhappy with their lot in life. This first post is just a little intro, and I thought Valentine's Day would be a perfect time to start a blog about being happy in singlehood! In future posts, I plan to share some stories and tips about how I've been able to avoid the unhappiness trap and find joy in my own life.